Best Anecdotes

A man and his wife entered a dentist’s office. The wife said, “I want a tooth pulled. I don’t want gas or Novocain because I’m in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.”
“You’re a brave woman,” said the dentist. “Now, show me which tooth it is.”
The wife turns to her […]

Biker almost drived into a beautiful lady. She says:
- Couldn’t you call me next time?
- Of course, just tell me your phone number.

Mountain skier training courses consists of three chapters: to learn how to put on skies, to lear how to land from the mountain, and to learn how to walk with  crutch.

Barber is shaving a client and cuts his skin the third time. Client can’t perish anymore and shouts:
- Please give me a shaver, too. I want to defend myself.

In one busy street in Paris two Santa Clauses meet each other. One says:
- Do you still believe in kids?

Train stops at the station somwhere in a middle of the United Kingdom. Passenger is asking the conductor:
- How long are we going to wait?
- From two to two, to two two (from 1:58 to 2:02)

One day drummer became too tired for all that teasing he was getting. He decided to learn to play with the real musical instrument so he got himself to musical store. Took a look around and told to saleswoman:
- I want that red trumpet and this accordion.
- Hmmmm, - okay, you can take the extinguisher  […]

One lonely passenger is driving by bus. Suddenly armed brigand gets in and shouts:
- Money!!!
- I don’t have even a sinlge penny!
- So why are you so scary then?
- I thought it was a controller.

Tommy, your composition about the kitten is the same as your brother word by word!
- Yes, sir, you see, we were writing about the same our kitten we have.

A plane is flying through the big storm. Suddenly one engine stopped working and plane fell down into the sea. Captain of the plane says:
- Ladies and Gentelmen, please take it easy, listen to me now. Everybody should start swimming to a nearest island. And I am thankful for using the services of our company. […]