Best Anecdotes

Biker almost drived into a beautiful lady. She says:
- Couldn’t you call me next time?
- Of course, just tell me your phone number.

Mountain skier training courses consists of three chapters: to learn how to put on skies, to lear how to land from the mountain, and to learn how to walk with  crutch.

Barber is shaving a client and cuts his skin the third time. Client can’t perish anymore and shouts:
- Please give me a shaver, too. I want to defend myself.

In one busy street in Paris two Santa Clauses meet each other. One says:
- Do you still believe in kids?

Train stops at the station somwhere in a middle of the United Kingdom. Passenger is asking the conductor:
- How long are we going to wait?
- From two to two, to two two (from 1:58 to 2:02)

One day drummer became too tired for all that teasing he was getting. He decided to learn to play with the real musical instrument so he got himself to musical store. Took a look around and told to saleswoman:
- I want that red trumpet and this accordion.
- Hmmmm, - okay, you can take the extinguisher  […]

One lonely passenger is driving by bus. Suddenly armed brigand gets in and shouts:
- Money!!!
- I don’t have even a sinlge penny!
- So why are you so scary then?
- I thought it was a controller.

Peter returns from school. His mother asks:
- Peter, what did father told you then you came back after party at 3:00 o’clock yeterday?
- Say it without swear-words?
- Sure!
- Nothing, then.

Young Peter is telling to his father:
- Dear father, I can pass fire and water for you!
- It would be better if you could pass to the second form.

Tommy, your composition about the kitten is the same as your brother word by word!
- Yes, sir, you see, we were writing about the same our kitten we have.